During a recent conversation with a friend, he confided in me that he wasn’t the most happy person, but for reasons he could not determine. His wife, family members, and friends all told him that he looked happy, and that everything he was doing “should” provide the happiness he sought.
I had to take a step back and ask him what makes him happy. In this day and age, there are prescriptions for everything! You’re sick, take a drug; you want success, find it here; you’re sad, you must be doing something wrong or not looking in the right places. Who would know better what “should” make you happy other than yourself?
So when you ask yourself what makes you happy, this should really take some time on your behalf. My friend did have to take a few days to get back to me after realizing that what he needed more than anything else was to find himself again. He had been fitting himself into the mold that everyone had told him to master, and with all the changes in his life, he wasn’t being true to himself.
When you establish what you SEEK, then you can start working towards how you SEE the world. If you’ve always worn blinders, running a horse race that leads to no where, you’ll never get to your destination: HAPPINESS. So take the time to open your eyes to what’s really important to you. Once you know where you want to go, then you can make choices (yes, you have agency) to get you where you want to be.
This first step is missed by so many people. So I write here as a reminder to dig deep down inside to work through all the messiness, clutter, and expectations. Be all those things, but know that somewhere, underneath all of the layers is your true light.